Who needs gravity when your profits are sky-high?
Forget the fluff, this isn't a recipe on a cooking site. You want new customers? Here are three hacks for manipulating social media so your e-commerce store can be the next big thing. Prepare for lots of likes and all the delicious dopamine that comes with them.
1. Weaponize Social Media for Maximum Impact
Social media isn't just for stalking your high school friends and doom-scrolling. It's your secret weapon for reeling in unsuspecting customers. Time to make your profiles irresistible. How? Content and ads.
Devious Tactics:
- Craft Hypnotic Content: Create mesmerizing posts that showcase your goods in the wild. Think action shots, not sterile product pics. Make the kind of content that YOU would like to see... the kind of content that PEOPLE ACTUALLY WANT TO SHARE!
- Spark Conversations: Respond to comments, ask provocative questions (some good ones are "what are you wearing, sexy?" or "if you had to eat your grandma or your best friend, which would you pick?"), and run ridiculous polls. Yeah it might feel cringy, but guess what's even cringier? Not putting in any effort and somehow expecting results. Don't be cringe.
- Exploit Targeted Ads: Social platforms know more about your customers than their moms do. Use this creepy knowledge to your advantage with targeted ads.
What kind of content does everyone want to see? Nudity. But do they want to share it with their family and friends? Ehhh.
2. Supercharge Your Site with SEO Witchcraft
"SEO" might sound like boring nerd-speak, and you know what? It is. And you better learn to speak Search Engine Optimization (SEO) like the common elves of Middle-earth speak Sindarin, because SEO is the dark art of making your site impossible to ignore. Use this one thing to bring them all -to your site- and in the darkness -of your web-store- bind them -to your brand-.
SEO Tricks:
- Sprinkle Magic Keywords: Find those golden keywords your potential buyers are typing in. Google Keyword Planner is your crystal ball (or "palantir", if you'd prefer it in nerd-speak).
- Conjure Quality Content: Keep your site fresh with enchanting blogs, captivating product descriptions, and spellbinding articles. Like this one! It's pretty good so far, RIGHT?!
- Speed Up Your Site: If your site loads slower than the time it takes for one to simply walk into Mordor (that's the last Lord of the Rings reference, we promise), customers will go elsewhere. Use Google PageSpeed Insights to find where you can speed up your site.
3. Manipulate Customer Reviews Like a Puppet Master
Nobody believes your marketing blabber. THAT'S RIGHT, TAKE YOUR MARKETING MUMBO-JUMBO AND GET. IT. OUTTA. HEEAA! *throws computer through a window*. People want to trust fellow humans... so it's time to harness the power of reviews to do your dirty work.
Puppeteering Tips:
- Beseech Nicely: Beg for reviews with follow-up emails. Offer a tiny bribe—er, discount—to sweeten the deal.
- Showcase Praise: Flaunt those glowing testimonials on your site and social channels. Be shameless with them, make sure they’re front and center.
- Respond to Everything: Engage with all reviews, even the nasty ones. Especially the nasty ones. In a world of fake positive reviews, people tend to look a the bad ones first (don't lie, you do it too), so make sure you handle these well! Show you care and are always ready to fix things. Look up the 'Service Recovery Paradox' and thank us later ;)
Use these hacks well and your e-commerce store will be much more likely to succeed! Don't use these hacks, and watch with salty tears running down your cheeks as everyone who does use these hacks succeeds instead! It's a tough choice, isn't it?
Mix-Mix Mail
Want to know what's not a tough choice? Becoming a Mix-Mix Mail Member! At Mix-Mix Mail we make your e-commerce experience super duper simple with modern, modular fulfillment solutions. Ready to dominate the world? Let's get started!