"Sir, this is the customer support line... but yes, I would be honored to be your child’s godparent.”
Customer service isn’t just about saying, “How can I help you?” or apologizing when you’ve messed up so bad the customer has actually gone out of their way to contact you. It’s about making your customers feel so loved that they’d trust you with their plants... or maybe their dog (or --if you're really killing it-- trusting you enough that they encourage cosmetic surgery fashioning you in a horrifying parody of their likeness, in order to assume their day-to-day life and raise their children.)
In this post we're talking about three tips to make your customer service so good, customers will want to adopt you into their family.
1. Channel Your Inner Psychic
You don’t NEED a crystal ball to know what your customers want... but if you've already got one, might as well put it to use.
While “mind reader” isn’t usually listed in customer service job descriptions (isn't it sad how psychically gifted mutants have a hard time getting jobs in this economy?), if you want to be a customer service expert, you'll have to "open your mind."
Customers want you to anticipate their needs before they even realize they have them. Are they calling about a delayed package? Beat them to the punch with a preemptive email update. Are they annoyed about a website glitch? Drop them a discount code and a gif of a kitten with wide, sad eyes saying something incredibly cringey, like "sowwy our website cwapped out".
Proactive service is like a surprise gift, and who doesn’t love those? Nail it, and you’ll have customers asking for your advice on all things purchase related: “Should I buy this couch?” “Is Pilates worth it?” Congratulations --you’re now their customer service guru!
2. Become an Emotional Sponge
This should be you, but hopefully with less grease and fewer germs.
In a world where human connections are getting harder to find, customers just want to know that someone is genuinely listening. Here’s a radical idea: actually listen to them.
We know it’s tough --especially when they’re still upset about socks they bought from your store in 2012 that have recently shrunk in the wash. But channel your inner therapist: nod empathetically (even if they can’t see you), make soothing noises, and say things like, “I understand your pain. My own socks were lost in a tragic dryer accident just last week.”
When customers feel heard, they trust you more. They’re also less likely to escalate things --like suing you for everything you own, or publicly shaming you on social media.
3. Throw Out the Script
Here are a few fun ways to use your customer service script: throw it out; set it on fire; feed it to your neighbor's yappy dog. There are endless possibilities!
There’s nothing worse than a robotic script that feels like it was written by ChatGPT. Drop the tired “We’re sorry for the inconvenience” and talk to your customers like they’re humans... because that's usually what they are. Get creative! Make them laugh, make them feel special. Add some VOICE to your correspondence so that they don't feel like they're talking to a wall.
Instead of reading the same old responses, take each interaction as an opportunity to create rapport. Remember the customer's name and use it, or maybe briefly share how you've had the same experience and how you therefore understand what a hassle it is, and want to make it right with every fiber of your being!
Example:
“I remember you mam, you're the lady with 3 cats! How’s that salty bastard Mr. Whiskers doing? Gosh I hope he dies soon. Anyway, it's my pleasure to help with your refund; let me get started on that right away.”
Personalized service is key to turning an angry customer into your biggest fan. If you do your job right, by the end of the call, they’ll have forgotten all about their troubles and will be thinking about sending you a "Thank You" card instead.
In Conclusion
When customer service goes too well…
By channeling your inner psychic, becoming an emotional sponge, and tossing that script into the shredder, you’ll be providing customer service so great that your customers will feel like they’ve gained a new family member.
It might sound like a tall order at first, but it's honestly pretty easy. What's that, you didn't read the blog post at all and want a super brief summary because you're too lazy to have ChatGPT do it for you? Fine, here it is:
People want to talk to real people, and be treated like they're a real person too. Give them that, and they'll love you for it. Now get out there and service those customers so much, they'll never forget it!
At Mix-Mix Mail, we get the power of exceptional customer service. We don’t just fulfill orders --we make sure every interaction feels like family. Whether you’re an e-commerce newbie or just tired of being stuck on hold, let us handle the heavy lifting and show your customers some real love! Adopt us today --figuratively speaking, of course. Unless....?